Dusk Stroll

Dusk breathes heavy on bare arms
Inhales weariness in bones
To caulk hollow cells anew.
Pink feathers canopy
Sweeping above, effortlessly stowing water
Sustaining life on land cracked in thirst.
My parched skin screams
A relentless itching for every craving
Relief lies on sand beneath the ocean’s breadth
          On the mountain’s anterior
          Inside the undeveloped tulip bulb
          Just beyond my clawing fingers
I am discontent in the most content way
My steady pace sings the sun to sleep
And desire emerges in distant proximity with the stars

Kerith

 Collin Smith is speaking this week on "The surprising influence of a Godly Life"

These are my thoughts after his sermon Sunday morning:

"One, two, three, four, five. Ready or not! Here I come!" These exhilarating words have chimed in and out of school halls, babysitting afternoons and lazy days in the park. As children we light up at the thought of tucking our small bodies away in crevices and corners in order to be found. We live for the tickle in our tummy.
As we grow older, we hide not for game's sake but for embarrassment and avoidance of confrontation. Peeking around the corner no longer carries an exhilarating thrill but a lurking doom with the potential of being found out. Whether child or adult, anticipation and a jump in the pit of your stomach await you at the sight of your seeker.
To be hidden by God is a different thing all together.
Elijah was hidden by God in the valley called Kerith. (1 Kings 17) He was held in the palm of God's hand for a season; a period of growth, self reflection, patience. A season of quietness.
We may have a vision of what we should be doing or accomplishing. Most of us have bought in to the pattern of our culture; planning our future in order to marry and have a successful job in a respectable and timely fashion. Many who experience failure or sudden change of direction live in bitterness. We fail to accept where God provisionally places us in life.

Where does our childish anticipation go when we are placed in Kerith?
Rather than a shooting thrill at the phrase "ready or not," we dread the potential discomfort and the inevitable red flush of shame. Whether we are ready or not, God has the best path marked out.
For it is in hiding when we are found out. In the dark cool place where you wait on God, naked and kneeling, enclosed on all sides by a tent of grace, you are known. "Lovers desire to be alone together" When you close the door you avail your soul to gaze solely on your Lover; a devoted righteous romance awaits you in the valley.

God hides us. His will.
God leads us. His protection.
God feeds us. His provision.

Welcome the quiet waiting periods where growth occurs in resting trust. 

Excellence

My God does not take the short way out. He does not cut corners. He does not do a sloppy, halfhearted job. He is full and whole in all things good, pure and righteous. 

My God is excellence.

I am called to be excellent.

I must be excellent to the people around me; doing my best to provide for their needs over mine, being trustworthy, honest and loyal in every relationship and holding fellow Christians accountable to the standards Christ calls us to.

I must be excellent in my work; doing a thorough job no matter who is looking, keeping a positive attitude despite the circumstances, spurring coworkers on in optimism and joy from the Holy Spirit, remembering who I am ultimately working for.

I must be excellent to my family; responding to them in love, supporting them in hardship, doing my part to alleviate the load, acknowledging the blessing they are growing with them daily.

God challenged me with excellence. It is a high calling, one I can not accomplish in my own depraved state. With His grace I can emulate the excellent Savior I am continually getting to know. This savior has been clawing my heart, showing me the lack of excellence in my own life. This is my response:

Actions of Excellence 

1.Sacrifice my schedule to invest in people daily. Be intentional about genuine conversation.

2. Question others about their challenges.

3. Seek out a younger girl who I can mentor.

4. Find someone to memorize and meditate on one bible verse together daily.

My list is longer, but too personal to share. I challenge you to open your eyes to the excellence that God is calling you to today. Lets take action together.

You Color My World

I associate colors with people. I can't do it when put on the spot, it has to come naturally to my mind.

The demeanor of a person determines their perspective color. The aura of an individual's character, the brightness of their expression, their perspective on life radiates shades accordingly.

• Yellow- The bright, expressive, artsy female. She is the sun. Her presence beams rays and her art is an extension of her luminosity. Eyes are drawn to her effortlessly, she does not hide but does not welcome attention. She is admirable at a distance and is fiery up close; an intense sporadic spirit.
• Red- The cool, perceptive, fun-loving and deep individual who invests emotions easily. This person talks to everyone and has many friends. When you see them you smile and wave, they aren't part of particular clique and invite others warmly into their company. 
• Green- The outdoorsy male. His Huck Finn tendencies find him exploring small spaces, starting fires, climbing the unclimbable and taking sporadic trips to terrible and difficult excursions. He brings a good time wherever he goes and has a tendency for getting in trouble. He is comfortable in his own skin and confident in his natural talent and ability.
• Grey- The mysterious gentle male. He may be overlooked by a crowd but all it takes is one encounter to draw one's attention. His level of insight surprises those engaged. His presence is often taken for granted but readily appreciated, found refreshing and craved. His sense of humor mingles with the crowd, he discerns and naturally others trust him. 
• Blue- The introverted, antisocial media buff. This individual is often thought of as unique; functioning at their optimum when immersed in a comic book, talking animatedly about the next video game to be released or scrolling through stumble upon. This person values art and history, does well in school academically but remains in the library while others are conversing at lunch. Their opinion flows freely when asked, no restraints necessary; they are grounded in a different reality and do not desire departure. 
• White- The silent, shy and quiet female. This porcelain doll, a sheltered book worm who bruises easily is a pure and pale skinned angel. She is borderline unapproachable in her evanescent aura and therefore has but a few kindred spirits. Reaching to the depths of her soul takes many an engagement, she does not give information easily. 
• Black- A secretive, nondescript, sneaky male. His smile does not fool you because his hidden intentions show through a translucent cape. He has a villainous aura but survives with persuasive speech and people-pleasing schemes. He thrives on rebellion and is a poison in the veins of vulnerable naive peers. He doesn't need help from anyone but will openly share his biased opinion. He refuses to change.

These shades of personality are shifting and molding in my head as a meet people and understand better the color that fits them. Some colors I still look forward to meeting. 

Hard Work

Ephesians 4:31-5:2
Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you. Follow God’s example, therefore, as dearly loved children and walk in the way of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God. 

   ^{People get tired. Work becomes mundane. Frustration sets in after the newness passes and the end is not near in sight. This is normal right?
   When we are called to serve a higher authority than our boss down the hall, we can not get away with halfhearted service. The Pintrist window may have been quickly replaced by the dutiful excel spreadsheet, successfully fooling your boss, but where he walks away, He dwells persistently. 
   Paul understood this. He got it; work is not about the show, the amount of money you make, the status of your job, the status in your job, the quality of your work atmosphere, the levelheadedness of your boss. He reminds us in Ephesians to "serve wholeheartedly, as if we were serving the Lord, not people." 
   The truth of the matter is, we are serving the Lord in whatever job we are doing. Dr. Zimmerman preached about this on Wednesday night. He asked us if we had ever prayed that our needs would be met, that we would be provided for. Of course, most everyone raised their hands out of a common prayer "give us this day our daily bread." Think about how your food gets to your dinner table. The farmers grow the food, the truck drivers transport the food, the factory workers package, the grocery clerk stores and sells and you make the final purchase; an easy step with hard earned money. Each worker was used by God as an answer to your prayer. "Whether blue collar or white collar, salary or wage" we have all probably been an answer to someone's prayer by the work that we have done. The quality does not discount the nobility of your work. 
  Zimmerman ended his sermon asking these three questions: 
What have I been given?
What am I doing with what I have been given?
What do I want to hear when my time on earth is finished?}



"Obey them not only to win their favor when their eye is on you, but as slaves of Christ, doing the will of God from your heart. Serve wholeheartedly, as if you were serving the Lord, not people" Ephesians 6:6

I met you

I walk out to meet you

To the edge

Where the water meets the dock

My feet hover above crisp morning ripples

Your face lights up, green with life

Leafy spotted shadows wink at me

I shut my eyes

And smile

Your arms stretch out, gentle with warmth

A fiery yellow embraces my body

I fold my hands under my chin

And inhale

Your voice sings a lullaby, a tinkling chime

Chirping from treetops swoops into my ears

I stop talking

And listen

You stood before me

You walked beside me

You settled behind me

You besieged me when I met you

Groove

We are now finally in the groove of things here. After the first two weeks of acclimation and preparation, this week the camp is sold out and we are doing our jobs efficiently on a daily basis. Each morning from 8-1 we do maid service on 35 units along the beach front. After lunch we do different things based on the day; Once a week I am on call from 5-10, Tuesdays we clean Tibbits auditorium, Wednesdays we clean the tentels,and the other days we have other assignments around camp that need to be touched up.

I enjoy my job. It would be easy to complain, but I am thankful God has given me the ability to work and a team that doesn't hesitate. My body is physically tired but I am just getting used to doing what I am doing every day.

I thank God today for my roommates.

Its Simply Perplexing

“His pleasure is not in the strength of the horse, nor his delight in the legs of man; the Lord delights in those who fear him, who put their hope in his unfailing love.” Psalm 147:10-11

I was arrogant. I was under the impression that I had it all together. I was swimming in the lie that I knew my stuff and could chime in with an intellectual comment on any conversation. I have read this story, I know what happens. I learned about this in youth group, I heard this story in middle school-multiple times. 

The bible did not lose its flavor, I lost my taste. 

When did I begin to stray from the simple? The simple truth; God loves me, he is ferociously pursuing me and I must bend to his will. Through this lens everything else falls in to place, every other more complicated teaching makes sense. 

The fact is, I can’t move past the simple. The moment I begin to think that I understand the beautiful and powerful simplicity of Christ’s love, I have lied. In its very nature it is perplexing.

“How high, how deep, how wide?” I can never know. 

In the simple truth of his love; I am cleansed. I am humbled. I am overwhelmed. I am taught. I am honored. I am chosen. I am called. I am who he created me to be. This is simply the most powerful truth.

Christ’s love compels us.